I’m About To Get A Little Emotional…

I’m not here to write YET another article about why you should stop watching television.  Chances are, you’ve heard all of the reasons, and you are probably sick of being preached to.  Or, you don’t watch television, and you’re tired of trying to enlighten people, because they won’t give up this “digital drug”,  because that’s exactly what television is!  It’s addictive, and designed to keep you on the couch so that you can be trained in what the think and what to do.

See, I ride the line between the two fences.  One one hand, I enjoy my television.  I know why people like to watch it, because I get satisfaction out of it.  On the other hand, I can see what it does to people, and wonder what it would be like if people made it a point to turn the TV off for just ONE hour of their free time a day.

I don’t expect everyone to get up and start riding bikes, or going to the gym.  I’m not talking down to television because of health reasons.  What annoys me about television is the way that it treats it’s loyal watchers.  There’s a very parasitic relationship going on between television and the people who watch it, and here I have 8
Juicy, Voluptious reasons why Television sometimes annoys me.

#1 Reality Shows

Some people like reality shows.  Good for them, personally, they annoy me.  The only reason that they exist is so that the networks can make more money on the same timeslot.  Casting average people and putting them together in a giant house costs less than casting seasoned actors and hiring quality writers.  Shooting multitudes of footage and piecing it together in such a way to “create” storylines and distort reality is easier than taking the time and effort to craft an engaging storyline.  Not to mention that there’s nothing “real” about “reality” TV.  So much of it is staged and enhanced, that it is often just as fake as any sitcom.  Reality TV exists to make more money from the viewers with less effort.

#2 Too Much Bad News

The news networks insist upon bad news, because they believe that people don’t want to hear good news.  Whether this is true or not is debatable, but it’s not just the news, it’s all over the TV.  Your dramas are full of innocent people who are killed by madmen every day.  Your documentaries tell tales of how the world is going downhill, and how there are thousands of animals species who will kill you if you come across it.  The television wants to keep you safe, on the couch, and not remind you that there are many positive, good things going on in the world as well that are outside your home.

#3 Too Many Commercials

I don’t necessarily believe that cable and dish providers should be commercial free, but I do believe that there should be far fewer commercials on pay stations.  If the numbers don’t add up, then how is that the fault of the viewer?  If we are going to be CONSTANTLY bombarded with advertisements selling us everything under the sun, then maybe those companies could afford to let us have those stations for free.  After all, they’re all making money, yet we continue to PAY them money just so we can have the opportunity to watch all of their lovely commercials so that we can go out and pay for their products.  Did I mention that this relationship is parasitic?

#4 Body Image Distortion

Television is probably most responsible for the fact that we have so many young people who think that they need to be rail thin in order to be attractive.  With the constant bombardment of these bulemic actresses with mental disorders, plastic surgeon commercials, and the constant fitness equipment advertisements, many teenagers have come to the conclusion that an unhealthy obsession with one’s own image is the only way to go.  These people fail to realize just how fake television is, and would get a giant wake-up call if they were to see some of their favorite TV personalities up close, without makeup!

#5 People Use It As a Crutch

How many people do you know who have a TV set in their living room, and by default, they have it on?  I’ve had friends who live like this, and it is a pain to visit them.  Having to sit around the altar of the TV.  Having to schedule your conversations around the commercial breaks or the breaks in action and dialog.  Having to compromise on what shows to watch.  This is not an unusual scene.  Too many people would be completely lost on what to do without their television.  They use it to fill a void that they have no idea what to fill with.  I don’t have a problem with having a TV in the room, but does it ALWAYS have to be on?

#6 Edited movies

I’m not talking about censorship.  Only the truly anal people will care that a few bad words got dubbed over on a rebroadcast movie.  What annoys me as how television networks will air a movie, and then completely butcher it!  They’ll cut scenes out, trim them, and make a completely new movie out of it in a vain attempt to fit all of their advertisements in.  Sometimes, they’ll even speed up parts of the movie!  I’ve seen it happen before.  It’s not nice to attract viewers to your network with a viewing of a movie that they love or that they want to see, and then give them a half-assed version of it!  That would be like a bookstore tearing pages out of books so that they can fit them on the shelf.

#7 Canceling Shows

Every once in a while a good, original show comes around that is artistic and well made.  And these shows always attract people who don’t watch a lot of TV, because these people get sick of the rehashed and reused concepts being used on so many shows.  The problem is that television executives don’t want to attract these viewers.  They want the groups of viewers who watch in order to see more of the same, so these shows ALWAYS get canceled, and then replaced with something inferior.  Mystery Science Theater 3000, Dark Angel, Carnivale, King of The Hill, and Firefly have all suffered from this problem.  They simply were too good to be on television, and thus got axed.

#8 Drug Ads

This is the most annoying thing for me by far.  There’s been talks of “toning down” drug ads, but I feel that they need to STOP COMPLETELY.  No more.  Nada.  Assuming, for a split second, that the average person needs one of these drugs, instead of a change in diet and more exercise, then that’s what we have doctors for, to properly prescribe them!  At this point, it’s almost impossible to turn on the tv without becoming a subject in an aggresive cold call, telling you that you must have this prescription drug, or terrible things may happen to you.  Not to mention that this is one of the main reasons why prescription drugs cost so damn much, because of the money the pharmaceutical companies invest in advertising!  Why isn’t there more of an outrage over this?  Are people so numb to this form of advertising that they think this form of drug dealing is okay, while they cry for the local meth dealers and stoners to be locked up?  It’s not a coincidence that prescription drug abuse is rampant, and is becoming a growing problem.  GET RID OF THE ADS NOW!

Simply put, there’s a lot of things wrong with the television industry, and since we’re in the middle of a revolution anyway, I say that if you are annoyed about any of these things, that now is the time to speak up!  I expect a healthy mix of television junkies and television haters with this article, and while I welcome both groups, I just wanted to remind you that I don’t belong to either of these groups.  Thank you.